How to Put an End to Racism

"There is no separation; That's been physically proven by science." - Jim Carrey

We've seen the images of white hoods and burning crosses. We've seen the Black Lives Matter movement. We have seen statues torn down. We have seen the justice system fail us, the education system fail us, and the media fail us. All of which have been broken down, chewed up, and spit out over the idea of race. People have created a monster in the United States. Not just one group of people but all groups have contributed to this. As of recently, the words racist and racism have been bastardized and misused in order to create a divide amongst the masses to perpetuate an illusion, a lie, a grand deceit. That's right. I said it. It's a lie. We have been told that particular people are oppressed and inferior. We have been told that many of us are oppressors and guilty for crimes that our ancestors committed. We have seen people threatened and silenced for fear of being thought of as racist. Many of us have been hoodwinked, conned, suckered, and bamboozled. We fell pray to fear, peer pressure, ego, and a false identity of self.
Here are the observations of a human. Not that of a white man. Not that of a black man. Not an olive skinned man. Just a human... a man. Here is the red pill of truth. Here is your wake up call, your sobering moment, the pink elephant in the room that no one wants to talk about. Here is where we are at and here is how we can pull ourselves out of this self induced nose dive of illusion. I'm going to suggest that ending racism is an individual problem rather than a national one and should be treated as such.

Stop labeling and identifying yourself by the color of your skin

There are two very distinct forms of racism. The first is the most noted: When someone shows a bias either for or against another person based on their skin color, they are a racist. Pretty simple, right? But there is another side to the coin. Here is the yin to that yang that no one points out. When you identify yourself by your own skin color, you have voluntarily separated yourself from others. If you say, "I am a black man. You are a white man." You have now created a self imposed division by doing this. Guess what? You are now contributing to the problem. You have provided the gasoline for the fire. You have bought into the illusion that you are what you see in the mirror. When in fact you are as much your skin color as you are the paint on the walls. If you stop labeling yourself, your enemies are powerless against you; including the enemy within, the ego.

When you separate yourself by color, you will expect to be treated poorly by people who look different than you.

Sad psychological fact. If someone looks different, they will treat us different, right? Not necessarily. But we look for and expect people who are a different color than us to treat us unfairly and we blame our skin as the "go to" reason we are being treated as such. That's because we have been "programmed" to think this way. Our parents, teachers, television, and friends have been influencing our thought process and our perceptions of life since birth. When we are repeatedly told that we are a certain race or color it becomes so ingrained in most of us that it becomes our identity. It is often always an over looked fact that we are perpetuating a lot of our own problems in regards to race. Your perception of yourself and others is your reality, even if it's not really true.

You are personally responsible for your life.
You are the master of yourself. Not your color. Not your body. No one. Nothing. There is no one else to plead to. God is not going to interfere with your choices. It is up to you how you act and react to people and the world around you. There is no being that is trying to "hold you down" other than your own thoughts and perceptions. Your ego is the one that whispers in your ear and tells you things like, "They don't like you because you are black or brown or white." Or it says, "You don't look like them and they have it out for you."  Don't believe a word your ego says. The egos job is to deceive you. Your higher self is the true perception of the world around you. It speaks from the heart or the "gut." Not the programmed ego.

There is no need to be proud of your pigment or heritage.
Here is another silly lie we have been told ever since I can remember. It sounds like it's true because it's been beat into our heads. "Be proud of your heritage as a (black, white, Italian, Asian,) blah blah blah..." Let me ask you a few questions. Did you make your skin color? No. Are you directly involved with either the accomplishments or failures of your ancestors? No. So why in the world would you have any right or claim to be proud of these things? I'm not saying you should feel ashamed. I'm saying you should have no attachment what so ever to it. Pride is something that should be minimal and should be based on an individual personal accomplishment. We did not make ourselves so the idea that we should be proud of our skin is absurd. Your skin is not an accomplishment nor is it you; nor can you take credit for people who actually fought for civil rights, progression, or anything else. Pride is reserved for the people who did amazing things. Being born isn't one of those things.     

Realize this...

You are not your body.

I have said this time and time again. When you get over yourself and your ego, you realize the temporariness of life. As we age, our mind stays young but our physical appearance is constantly changing. Therefore we realize that our bodies will eventually fail. Your skin tone is irrelevant. So... If you aren't the person in the mirror then what are you? You are consciousness trapped inside of an organic meat wagon that transports your awareness around space and time. The concept of you or self is merely a collection of habits, labels, and ego. Inside everyone of us is the same conscious energy. You are as much your body as the car you drive or the house you live in. None of which are you. Your body, your name, your very DNA isn't you either. So the very idea of the color of your skin being you is ridiculous and void.

Your oppression is often self inflicted.

What you think about expands. If you think about how oppressed you are then you will find more oppression. You will often interpret opposition as oppression or bigotry. If you continuously see yourself as a victim, then you will always be one. However, if you begin to peel off the layers of illusion and realize your true self, then you will see yourself within everyone, no matter what color they are. The color, the body, the gender disappears. Remember, you are truth, you are consciousness, and you are bliss, just like everyone else. No more, no less. 

When you celebrate diversity, you create more separation.

Having a different opinion or perception can be a good thing. It can lead to much needed individual growth. But when we focus and celebrate our outward diversity we often forget our commonalities with others in the process. This leads to separation, labels, and inferiority complexes. You can't find common ground to connect with people on if you are swept up in differences. When we focus on differences we place our selves on the opposing team from others around us. This has become an obvious implosion within our country. 

We don't need to be reminded about slavery to keep us from repeating it.

Contrary to the narrative of many people, you don't have to discuss atrocities of this magnitude to keep people from repeating it. In Germany they don't teach that the Holocaust happened but it hasn't happened again since. Think about it. Do you need to be reminded that murder is wrong? I don't. How about rape? No, right? Do you honestly think that at some point in time in the United States people will actually suggest that we should try slavery again? Of course not! So why in the world do we think that we need to continue to be reminded of it? I personally feel that trying to argue that we need to talk about slavery continuously to keep history from repeating itself is just a palpable way to continue to push an illusionary narrative to divide people further. We need to stop falling for this trickery. There is no person living today in the United States that owned slaves nor is there any living slaves. You can not and should not exploit the trauma of our ancestors in anyway nor should you use their hardship for your own gain or influence. But if you watch the "news" for 15 minutes you will see just that happening. 

If we want to be thought of as equal and same, then we must first convince ourselves of it.
We must understand who we are, who we aren't, and the role the ego plays into how we perceive ourselves and the world around us. The absolute truth is that you and I and the neighbors... we are all the same. We are all one. One force of conscious energy that has manifested matter for the purpose of having human experiences. We are made of the same stardust, the same energy, from the same divine force. You are not your body, your car, your job, your thoughts, your habits. You are me. I am you. We just need to remember... 

How Fear is Ruining Your Life

"So many of us choose our path out of  fear disguised as practicality." - Jim Carrey

I think the greatest disease of our time is fear. Fear has killed more dreams than any failure has. Fear has led to wars, division, and misunderstandings. Fear has stopped people from pursuing their goals, finding love, loving themselves, and understanding others. Fear feeds the ego. How many instances can you look back on where you chose your path or made a decision out of fear? Fear of failure. Fear of rejection. Fear of being hurt. Fear of feeling not good enough. Let's take a look at what fear is, how it affects our lives, and what we can do to conquer our fears.

F.E.A.R. "False Evidence Appearing Real" (Zig Ziglar)

Many times throughout the day we're faced with enormous anxiety, doubt, insecurity, worry, and fear. We refer to our fear as, "stress," but it's really just fear. I guess at some point, in adulthood perhaps, you aren't suppose to say that you are afraid; but that's exactly what it is. It's fear. If we are being honest with ourselves, the internal dialogue we would have would look a lot like this: "I'm scared of losing."  "I'm scared I'll be fired from my job." "I'm scared I'll be laughed at and rejected." "I'm scared I'm not good enough." On and on and on... If we would just stop and take a step back for a moment, sit with our fear, then perhaps we could better understand our fear and even see that most of what scares us and holds us back is all an illusion that our ego has nightmarishly dished out to us.

Fear keeps you from your pursuing your dreams

If I were to ask you, if you could do any job that you wanted, what would that job be, would your answer be what your job is now? For most people, no. Why? Why aren't we doing what we want to do? Because for most of us we talked ourselves out of going for what we wanted. We didn't feel good enough, smart enough, rich enough, good looking enough. We panicked at the thought of things just not working out and failing. We didn't want to be a disappointment to anyone. For many of us, not trying was easier than dealing with rejection or failure. But what so many people opted for was trading their passion for safety. And they will never know how far they could of excelled had they went for what was in their heart. 

Fear keeps you from loving others and from loving yourself

Have you ever wanted to date someone but you talked yourself out of asking them out? How many times have either heard or have said, "That person is out of my league." I  had an older gentleman tell me a piece of dating advice when I was a teenager that I always remembered every time I wanted to talk to a woman. The advice was this: "If you don't ask, the answer is always, 'No'." Stop judging yourself. Stop judging others. Pretend, if you must, that no one is better than you and you are no better than anyone else. Because that is the absolute truth of life. We have enough people judging us, so they don't need our help drawing conclusions. Stop worrying about your hair, your height, your weight, your accent, or education. The most powerful thing you can be is yourself. The right people will always appreciate you for you.

Fear stops you from fully experiencing life

Get on the boat. Go to the party. Talk to that good looking person. Get on the horse. Go into the gym. Taste the wine. Go for that promotion. Show up for the audition. Sing your song. When you do what is called, negative self-talk, you talk your self right out of experiencing the richness and fullness of life. It's the party that you didn't go to because you weren't confident that may have stopped you from meeting the person you've been waiting for. It was all the times you didn't join the gym because you felt too "out of shape" and didn't want to feel like everyone is looking at you that kept you from getting into good shape. Here is the truth: You, me, all of us, are going to die. Hate to be that blunt, but it's a fact. We will regret more things that we didn't do and the chances we didn't take way more than what we did do in life. You are good enough. If you don't think so, fake it till you make it and get out of the house!

Fear clouds your spirituality 

Religiously speaking, most of us are told (programmed) as to what religion we should believe in; usually by our parents. Growing up in a Southern Baptist home, I was told by many people at church that if I didn't believe like them that I would go to hell. I was told to not associate with anyone that questions the bible or has any difference of opinion on God. This experience led me to be utterly confused about God, about my life, the nature of the self, and it really closed my mind to so much beauty within other religions and cultures for many years. I can't imagine anything scarier than eternal damnation. (If you can, tweet it my way.) Look no further to our communities and the media to see how fear is used to divide us, control our behavior, our choices, how we see ourselves and judge others. It's all a wizard of Oz, man behind the curtain, song and dance. Don't buy into it.

Fear pushes people away.

Whether it's fear of being wrong about religion, fear of rejection, fear of being hurt, fear disguised as misunderstanding of others, fear often makes us push people away. Fear causes us to behave irrationally and makes us defensive when we shouldn't be. Fear makes us become offended. Often times we feel the need to be right so strongly that we take away the voice of other people to make ourselves feel more secure. Fear of being wrong or admitting wrong doing is one of the greatest detriments to people and the United States' political climate right now. The citizens in the US can't even give one another space to express themselves without condemning opposing views. (Much like the fear tactics found in many religions and organized establishments.) 

Dissolving fear

You will never be able to be completely "fearless." It's part of being trapped in the human body and part of the human experience. It can be used as a tool to either control you or make you claim your independence. The choice is yours. If you want to overcome fear you must first understand that most of what you fear or have anxiety about is a work of fiction and your ego is writing the script. Failure isn't fatal. Success is what happens when you try that one additional time after you failed. Your ego isn't that voice telling you that you are great and that you are better than this guy or that gal. No. it's the voice that tells you that you aren't good enough and tells you that you're going to fail. The ego is that cliché devil on your shoulder. (E.G.O. = Edging God Out) Recognize it when you feel fear coming on.

You have to come to a point where you accept your mortality as a human. You must learn to know and be okay with the fact that everything you see and have in this world is fleeting and temporary. When you can do that, not only will you approach life with this new kind of bravery, but you will approach it with more of an unattachment. Your life will become more like a playground than a test. Fear will start to look less like a monster and more like a clown. 

I feel fear just like you. I get nervous every time I ask a girl out. I feel anxious every time I audition or perform as an actor. I even get nervous writing this blog. But I don't feed my fears. I let them pass by me like a breeze. I don't entertain them or serve them tea. I breath. I remind myself that whatever happens, it won't be the end of the world. I see the acronym YOLO (You Only Live Once)  a lot on social media. As a Buddhist it makes me chuckle because I believe in rebirth but I digress. But if you do only live once, I think if you do it right, once is enough. Don't live in fear, live out loud. Go for your dreams. Get the hottie. And for God's sake eat the cake and buy the damn shoes. 

  

6 Ways to Change Your Perspective for a Better Life

"These mountains that you are carrying, you were only suppose to climb." ~Najwa Zebian

For many of us, getting out of bed first thing in the morning is a daunting task. If I can get the bed made before I walk out of the door, I consider that a win. All of us have responsibilities to live up to. A lot of us have kids, a spouse, a job, debt, errands to run and the list goes on and on. We get lost in translation; lost in the distractions of our life. Even when we lay our heads down at night to rest, we lose sleep thinking about the events of today and worrying about tomorrow. We get completely engulfed in routine and in the machine of life. Here are a few suggestions to help you refocus, re energize, and shift your perspective from stress to rest.

Realize that money doesn't buy happiness.

One of the big follies in our time is that having money equals having happiness. Money does only one thing: it makes life more convenient. That's it. No more, no less. Money often creates suffering. The bigger the house you live in, the more there is to clean and the bigger your mortgage. The fancier the car you drive, the more you worry about someone damaging it. Quite often the more stuff we own, the stuff ends up owning us. Real happiness comes from inside you. If anything, the relationships we have with others also affects are true overall happiness more so than the Benjamins.

Stop looking for someone to "complete" you.

Relationships are a very important part of the human experience. We are communal creatures. But the Jerry McGuire romantic idea that there's a "better half" that completes you is truly Hollywood fiction. The good news is that, believe it or not, you are already complete! You just have to realize that. You do that by really getting to know yourself, spending time in nature by yourself, and giving yourself the freedom to be you. You must love yourself. If you are in search of your soul mate, take a look in the mirror. You are them. If you want to be loved, you must first be love.

Don't identify yourself by the color of your skin.
We have each been programmed since birth in several ways. One way, that is absolutely necessary to reprogram, is defining or identifying yourself by your skin. You must realize that your skin color is as much who you are as the car you drive. It isn't you at all! You are not your body. Just like you are not your car. Your body, your car, are just methods to transport your consciousness around the planet. Often times, we inadvertently manifest our own biases due to either a false sense of self, i.e. an inferiority complex, or a predetermined illusionary view of others. It's not real folks. Drop that burden from your shoulders right now. Your race, my race, their race, is human.

You are not a political party.
Right now, we are a nation divided. We generally categorize ourselves as either a Democrat or a Republican. It's become a "my team versus your team" climate. Truth is, most of us are truly neither one or the other but a mix of both political ideologies. Most of us want the same results for our country and for our lives but we have different ideas on how to achieve the goals. When we become engulfed in pledging some kind of an allegiance to a political party, we separate ourselves from others. But when we realize that most of us have common goals and we want to each be treated fairly and respectfully, we dissolve teams and we dissolve separateness. You are merely an energy of consciousness having a human experience; just like everybody else.

Live for the experience, not for the "selfies."
One of the most rewarding things you can do is step away from the computer, put down the phone, and go out into the world and have an adventure. It doesn't have to be anything elaborate; just fun. Rent a kayak. Get on a bicycle. Have a girl's night. Organize a poker party. Go exploring. Climb a tree. Learn to paint. Dip your toes into the ocean. Take in the moment. Really stop and observe. Forget your phone and forget capturing the scene on Instagram. Capture the moment in your mind, in your heart, in your breath. It's the little adventures we have with others that will mean more than attaining the approval or envy of others. Forget about the presentation of it and just live out loud.

Be the person that you are looking for in others.
If you want people to treat you kindly, then be kind. If you want others to be honest with you, be honest with people. If you want to find someone beautiful, then discover your own beauty first. Your vibe does attract your "tribe." If you do that does that mean everyone is going to mirror your behavior? Certainly not. We are all at different points in our own individual journeys. But I can promise you that like attracts like. And what you act like comes back to you in many forms. The most powerful thing you can be is yourself. Be the best version of that self that you can be and watch who enters (and exits) your life. It's magical!

Real change, real happiness, begins with our perspective. We must make conscious effort to understand ourselves; which in turn will help us to understand our circumstances and the world around us. You are the divine authority in your life. Higher forces may have made you, but your experience in life is your individual responsibility. Tame your mind. When you change your mind, you change. When you change, your life will change.